Ignorance

Memories that make me cringe

When I was around 10 years old, my father and his girlfriend at the time brought me to a summer party at a friends house. This was somewhere in an Urban area, but the city escapes my mind. 

The house was full of strangers. I didn't recognize anyone. I was not a very social kid. 

At some point or another, these two other boys began interacting with me. One was a chubby young black boy and the other was white, very thin, with long dark blonde hair. 

At some point during our interaction, I ignorantly asked the kid with the long hair, "Why is your hair so long like a girls hair?".

I didn't realize at the time how a question like that might make someone feel. 

Needless to say he got very upset, and the other boy said to me, something along the lines of - it's because of his religion asshole. 

They were both a little bit older than me, but still kids nonetheless. 

I immediately regretted what I said. In hindsight, realizing that I had offended the boy. I went out in front of the house alone, and decided to hide. Afterall, I had a poor track record of social interaction. Better off alone I thought. 

I started to cry a little thinking about what I had done. The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt someone. Ignorance is like a flame. Whether it is intentional or not, it can often hurt all those around you. 

Being a group of 3 children, it should not be surprising that the reaction was equally juvenile. 

Despite the sincere apology, they had decided to seek out revenge. They found me hiding out in front of the house and followed me around throwing small rocks at me.

I can't say I would not have reacted in a similar way if I was in his shoes. Especially when you have a friend nearby encouraging the behavior. 

We do stupid things as kids often out of ignorance.

The memories that often haunt me the most are the times I hurt someone unintentionally from my own ignorance or stupidity. 

I learned a lesson that day. Not just about being cautious about the types of questions you ask people or about learning more about people different than us - but I also learned to be patient with people who have been hurt. A child might throw rocks at someone, but as adults our stones are often much more subtle.